On coping with rejection.

The biggest difference between those who succeed in life, and those who fail, is in how they cope with rejection. Some are spurred on by it – others are destroyed by it.

Today, I stumbled on an Internet reference to an Indian Singaporean boy who had shown significant precocity as a child. At the age of 12 or so, he was doing A level exams. He seemed set for a great future. Then he applied for Cambridge, with three A levels in hand...and got rejected. Now, this boy, who had been consumed every day of his young life by Maths and Physics, was totally disheartened by this. He gave up his studies of Maths and Physics. No details were given as to his mental state, but I imagine, from the way he behaved, that he was depressed. He no longer pursued his interests. They no longer seemed to interest him. His relative described him, at the age of 15, as having “lost both his interest and his ability” in both Maths and Physics. He no longer showed precocity. He had become “ordinary”.

It was saddening to read of this case, because I can only say, from my own experience of Cambridge University, that this boy’s rejection from it, may actually have been a good thing. As a young boy, in Cambridge, he would have faced a daunting level of stress and pressure. This may have been damaging and is likely to have been much more than he was prepared to cope with. Looking at his very stark reaction to a simple rejection, I cannot imagine it being even remotely possible that he could cope with life in such a pressured, demanding University. He has given up his life dream simply because one University said: “No.” That is profoundly silly, in its own way. Cambridge reject many good candidates every year...even some great ones slip through, no doubt. They do so, because they are oversubscribed – they are overflowing with good candidates to choose from. Another issue which this young boy seems to have overlooked, is his own age. I am sure that Cambridge is not keen to take on a young boy. They probably rejected him not for his grades (which admittedly were good, but not as good as most candidates), but because of his AGE. They probably didn’t want to cope with the challenges of taking on a thirteen year old, as he would probably have been by the time of admission.

This boy, of such great promise, has given up everything because he could not get into the University of his choice. In so doing, he is showing that he is unable to cope with rejection. Thus, though it is a shame that his talent may now never flower, I can’t help but feel that anybody who gives up, on one rejection, is not going to be able to cope with the difficulties of life. If it hadn’t been Cambridge rejecting him, that stopped him, it would have been something else. For all his evident intelligence and diligence, this boy lacks resilience – the ability to cope with adversity. Thus, whatever the size of his talent the likely dimensions of his success, are going to be limited by this failing. He will never be able to overcome challenges, until he learns to cope with rejection and be resilient in the face of life.

I hope he learns the skill of resilience and the toughness to cope with rejection. If he does not, there is no way this boy is going to achieve the heights his basic intellect and diligence promised. His descent into what seems like depression holds a lesson for all parents of gifted children: do not let your child be put off by a rejection – or indeed, many rejections . People are often rejected for reasons that have nothing to do with their talent. Such decisions should not be allowed to crush a child, but should just be used as a lesson in how life does not always go smoothly or according to our ideal wishes. All children need to learn to overcome such challenges. Children who don’t, are unlikely to ever succeed, no matter how intelligent they are.

Posted by Valentine Cawley

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A realm of misunderstanding

This is a post for someone I cannot write to, directly.

This person posted their misunderstanding of Ainan's situation. They had got the impression that no academic was interested in working with him. This is not so. There are a few who are. One in particular has been very helpful, but has actually little time spare from his position. Yet, he has done what he can to assist.

Another academic is presently preparing the way for Ainan to be actively engaged with them, on an ongoing basis, in the areas of his interest. This should begin soon - but I won't preempt it by revealing any details at this time.

So, contrary to this poster's view, academics do understand Ainan's need and some are willing to help.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged eight years and no months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and five months, and Tiarnan, twenty-two months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)

A Global Search for a University

We are looking for a University for Ainan because he will soon have taken A level - and once he has done that, he would need further opportunity to study - otherwise he would stagnate.

A level is at the level of a Major in an American Bachelor's degree. Ainan is ready to do that soon. But what will he do then? We have nothing in place at present, so we have to line something up for him. We are, therefore, interested in hearing from any University, worldwide that offers Chemistry and other sciences.

Our needs are quite specific, but a University need not meet all of our needs to be acceptable. Firstly, the University must have a strong Chemistry department. Then they should offer a wide spectrum of other sciences especially Physics, Material Sciences, Geology and Astronomy, as well as, ideally, Nanotechnology and Biology. These are secondary interests.

The medium of instruction should be English. The culture should be warm, accepting and welcoming. It should be a supportive, co-operative environment. Too many Universities are overly competitive, aggressive and hostile environments (in my view). That would not suit Ainan.

The University should be prepared to offer mentors. He is young and their guidance would be helpful. It should also be located in a relatively safe place. We don't want to have to worry about such things, unduly.

We are prepared to look anywhere in the world that is a reasonably comfortable place to live. As long as the University can provide a nurturing environment we would be interested in hearing from them.

If you are with a suitable University, or know of any, please contact us and tell us the details. We will then correspond to see if anything can be worked out.

Your help in this is very much appreciated. Thanks.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged seven years and eleven months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and four months, and Tiarnan, twenty-one months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)

What does "Early College" mean?

Everywhere, the world over, educational systems and standards differ. This makes it very difficult to understand what one nation's educational accomplishments mean without some research.

In America, there is a phenomenon known as "Early College". This is where a child aged under 18 goes to a "College" where the usual age of admission is 18. The procedure is undertaken not infrequently to address the educational needs of gifted children, showing precocity, who might otherwise become bored, disheartened and otherwise switched off, by an unchallenging education, at school. This seems like a good idea, therefore: but what does it mean? What is College?

Every country above the most primitive level, has Universities. Yet, not all Universities are the same. In particular, there is a divide between what an American University is and does - and what Universities in the rest of the world tend to be about - and provide.

In many countries, University is meant for an elite: it is not meant for all. In America, "College" is a much more common experience than it is for the nationals of many other countries. There is a reason for this. In most Western countries, a first degree is used for professional education. In America, a first degree is usually used for general education. What this means is that American Universities are actually doing what is done in secondary school/high school in Europe and all those countries that follow a European style of education (which includes Australia and parts of Asia, and even Africa, as I understand it).

In England, general education is completed, normally, at the age of 16. This is a typical age around the world for general education to have been completed. Then specialist education begins. In America, general education is completed by taking a four year degree: thus it is complete at the age of 22. This means that there is a very important difference between American and European education systems that must be understood if the two are to be compared. An American with a first degree has just completed their general education. A European with a first degree, has, in many cases, completed their professional education, AND their general education.

So, how may we compare the American system to the rest of the world? Well, the website of the Royal College of Surgeons of Ireland, compares requirements for admission to a medical degree, by applicants from different countries of the world. Distilling the essence of what it says is simple. A school leaver from secondary school/high school, aged 18, from anywhere in the world is, in theory, ready to start a medical degree in Ireland (if they are of good grades etc.). Yet, for an American applicant, A BACHELOR'S DEGREE is required for Admission to the normal program. Otherwise candidates have to undergo a special extended program longer than the usual degree.

This site equates an American Bachelor's degree as being equivalent to a high school education in the developed world - or in fact less. It states that an American Bachelor's degree is comparable to Year 11 of the Australian education system: that is, the age of attainment reached at the age of 17, by an Australian "high school" student.

Thus, back to my first question: what does Early College mean, in the American context? It means a high school educational opportunity, in the context of almost all the developed world. It does not mean "University-level" when compared to those who follow a European model.

As I have noted before, in other posts, this difference between the American system and the rest of the world, is due to the emphasis on breadth, at the expense of depth, in the American education sytem up to and including a Bachelor's degree. Most of the rest of the world looks into subjects at depth, much earlier on in a student's education.

This analysis of education systems helps us understand an interesting cultural observation. There are quite a few American kids in Early College, if internet boards are anything to go by. There are virtually none in University in the rest of the world. The reason for this is now clear: like is not being compared with like. An American student in Early College is studying material that a sixteen year old would study in High School/Secondary School in the rest-of-the-world system. Thus to compare like with like, we must look for rest-of-the-world students who have been accelerated to the later stages of High School/Secondary School. We do, in fact, find such students - although they are rare. (I do not have access to numerical data, but I have read of a few cases, in my lifetime). Furthermore, we also find some children who ARE in University while quite young - but these are few, in the rest-of-the-world. They are studying a Bachelor's degree in the main: this is equivalent to an American Doctoral degree.

(If you would like to read of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged seven years and eight months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and eight months, or Tiarnan, eighteen months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, genetics, left-handedness, College, University, Chemistry, Science, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, the creatively gifted, gifted adults, and gifted children in general. Thanks.)