A Christmas Shopping Experience, Singaporean style.

Singapore is a land of great shops...but is it a land of great shopping experiences?

Not necessarily.

Last week, I wanted to buy a book. This should be a simple matter since bookshops exist for that purpose. However, in Singapore, bookshops don't seem to know what they exist for.

I found the book on the very helpful Kinokuniya website and called them to reserve a copy. This didn't go as planned. The girl who answered the phone asked me to hold on while she tried to put me through to the right person...and so I held and held and held. Finally, she came back to me and said that the person was engaged...could she get them to call back?

"No. It is OK. No-one will ever call back anyway." I declined, quite rightly, since in Singapore I have never managed to get a call back from any shop I have dealt with. They don't provide that level of service or courtesy. They do, however, sometimes take your phone number, then let you wait for the call which never comes.

Instead, I went to the shop the following day, to get the book which I knew they had in stock.

My luck was not in. The only copy had sold that very morning. A quiet word with the information desk informed me that there was not another copy in any Kinokuniya store - but that they could order one for me in "six to eight weeks".

I did think it strange that an important book by a well known American thinker should only have one copy in stock in all Kinokuniya's bookstores.

She suggested I tried Borders.

I did. They didn't have it either but could get it in "four to six weeks".

I called Times Bookshop - but none of their stores stocked it, either. They didn't offer to order it.

I tried to call Popular bookstore's flagship shop in Bras Brasah - and here is where it gets interesting. The phone was engaged for about half-an-hour, before I could get it to ring. When it did ring, it was answered after a very long time, and immediately put on hold. No-one spoke to me. Then after about thirty seconds, they picked the phone up and immediately put the phone down, disconnecting the call.

I called again. They answered again, put me on hold, picked the phone up and disconnected me again.

Just for a laugh, I tried again, twice more in the next hour. The same thing was done to me on both occasions.

I tried calling the following day. No-one answered at all.

This is what I call "The Singapore Standard of Customer Service"...it is a Standard, because it is very common here. Many people in service jobs don't know that their job is to help people. They see it more as a means to a social life and pose around their shops and have vacuous conversations with each other (while keeping the customers waiting). When asked a direct question by a customer most customer service staff in Singapore will not know the answer. Many of them will not even speak any English. It is just ludicrous, at times, how difficult it is to get basic service, here.

The only reason I think that Singaporeans tolerate this, is that they are used to it. They cannot see that it is unusual because they do not have enough experience of the customer service standards in many other countries, to know that service is usually much better elsewhere.

So far, in my book hunt, I have learnt that there was only ONE copy of the book in the whole of Singapore, when my quest began. I missed that one copy by an hour or two. I have been unable to locate another copy. The only possibility is Popular bookstore, which, for all I know might have a hundred copies...but no-one there wants to let me know, because I have been unable to speak to any of their staff on the phone, despite repeated calls.

Eventually, I had to give up on buying the book, just now.

I am left with the feeling that a lot of recorded knowledge (that is, in the form of books) is not so readily available in Singapore. The bookshops here, are not very well stocked (too few copies of too few books, except for a few heavily promoted "leaders") - and there is no Amazon alternative (I have never been allowed, by Amazon, to ship to Singapore). I wonder, therefore, at how much Singaporeans never get to know, because they don't get the chance to read about it.

Of course, there is a natural limitation on the size and number of bookshops that Singapore can support. It is a small city, which probably precludes the presence of truly comprehensive bookstores (have you seen how small Borders is, for instance?). If Singaporeans don't buy books in sufficient numbers, it means that bookstores can't grow big enough to stock the widest range (in more than one copy, so there aren't two month ordering waits for one). So, I suppose, in a sense, the book situation is self-inflicted: there can't be enough people buying enough books, to support a truly comprehensive range of bookstores.

That being said, Kinokuniya comes closest to stocking a wide range of books. I just wish they had more than one copy of many of them.

On the book front, Singapore has one saving grace, of course: the library system (which is much better than the bookstore situation...perhaps one has ruined the other.)

Back to the main point of my post. Shopping should not be a difficult experience. Customer service staff, should, actually, provide good customer service. The answering of phones politely, promptly and helpfully is part of offering that service. No-one should have to make dozens of calls with no result. That one person has experienced this, indicates that most are likely to (for my calls were at random times). If that is so, then Singapore's retailers have a problem that they really must make an effort to solve. Customer service as bad as what I experienced with Popular is a public relations disaster: it breeds ill-feeling in customers and leads to a reduction in turnover. When it is as difficult to get information, as it was with Popular, customers will simply go elsewhere...perhaps permanently. After all, should retailers really be putting the phone down on customers, without speaking? Perhaps, unlike most industries, there is no recession for the book market and they don't need another sale...from the way they behave, one would think their business was to hoard books, not sell them. What a bizarre country this can be, at times.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged eight years and seven months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, five years exactly, and Tiarnan, twenty-eight months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, Singapore, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, wunderkind, wonderkind, genio, гений ребенок prodigy, genie, μεγαλοφυία θαύμα παιδιών, bambino, kind.

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Kiasu and age appropriate toys

In the run up to Christmas, I was in the toy section of a department store, with Tiarnan, who was then one year old.

Nearby there was a very intent Chinese man in his late 30s, I would say. I noticed him because his son was playing among the toys near my own son. This little boy of his, was shorter than Tiarnan, so I would think he must have been less than two years old - probably 18 months, or something.

What was strange about this was that he kept snatching toys off his son and putting them back on the shelf. The toys he took from him were ones with lights and bells and knobs to turn: simple interactive toys, which were, I felt, age appropriate given his apparent youth. The father seemed quite irked at his son's interest in these toys and would substitute a reading preparatory toy which had all the alphabet on it, and really looked rather complicated. I could see that it was labelled "Suitable for 3 to 6 year olds".

I paused at that. This man's son had a clear and strong interest in toys suitable for a one year old. He looked to be between one and two years old, by comparison with Tiarnan who was standing fairly near him. Yet, the father was trying to interest his son in a toy suitable for up to 6 year olds.

What was particularly interesting was what the son did, everytime the father presented him with the reading toy: he looked briefly at it, didn't look at his father and then turned away, to search for the toy that had just been taken from him. Once he had found it, he would resume playing with it again.

The father would just look angry. He would then pull the toy away from his son, or his son away from the toy and again present the reading preparatory toy. It was a battle of the wills. Yet, clearly the father was not going to win this one, since his son completely failed to attempt to interact with the toy presented to him.

Most telling of all, was what the mother was doing, throughout. She was looking on, motionless apart from her lips, which open and shut slightly and rather tensely, as if she wished to speak, but restrained herself. She looked from father to son and back again and did nothing. Clearly, though, she wanted to intervene; clearly she had a different opinion to the father as to what was suitable for the boy.

They were still at it when I left, with Tiarnan.

Though months have passed, this incident stayed with me, for it is emblematic of an attitude Singaporeans are famous for: Kiasu. This is the idea that they must win, that they can't lose or lose out and that they must compete to have it all.

Here was a most kiasu father. He wanted his son to read, just after he had learnt to walk. He didn't want his son to play with mere children's toys (even though the child liked them and they seemed appropriate). He wanted the child to be what the child was not. If the child was ready for reading, he would be showing interest in the reading toy. Yet, he was not. Looking at the boy, it was clear he would not be ready for a few years. Here, was a father who was not going to "lose out"...his son had to read before his neighbours'/friends'/relatives' children did etc etc.

I have reflected upon this. This man didn't know the difference between wanting the best for his son and wanting his son to be the best. They are far from being the same. If the child was ready for reading, then it would be appropriate to give him the toy presented. He might then be the earliest reader in the father's social circle. That is fine if it is so. However, unless the child is actually like that, then you cannot make him be so: the child cannot be made to be the "best" unless that is already in him.

Perhaps this father had heard of an early reader and was now competing with this other child, through his son. This is a common product of kiasu thinking. However, it is the child that suffers in all this, for the child cannot be what the child is not meant to be.

The attitude of kiasu should be laid to rest. Each and every child should be given what they, as individuals, need. If it is reading material at one years old, that is suitable, that is fine. However, the child should never be made to do that which is inappropriate to that particular child. Let each child be, what each child is.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged eight years and one month, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and seven months, and Tiarnan, two years exactly, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, Singapore, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)