Optimism vs. pessimism

A few days ago, Ainan observed:

“Negative thinking: you are never disappointed.”

His remark came in the midst of a conversation about attitudes on life.

He seemed to be endorsing negative thinking as the way to go. For him, it seemed self-evident that one who thinks negatively, is going to have less of a problem in life than one who thinks positively. Personally, I disagree. You see, in my household, I am the optimist, and my wife is somewhat of a pessimist. It seems, however, that Ainan has inherited more of my wife’s disposition, on the matter, if he spoke autobiographically. I think this is a bit of a pity since there is something about optimism or positive thinking that my son has overlooked: an optimist will always give something a try because he or she believes there is a good chance of success, if one does so. The pessimist, on the other hand, may not try some particular endeavour having convinced themselves that they will not succeed, so why bother?

Luckily, Ainan’s devotion to “negative thinking” does not appear to be strong. In fact, I wonder if he was endorsing it in a tongue-in-cheek fashion. You see, Ainan is always trying new things and creating new things. So, he is certainly not held back by the typical pessimist’s attitude to such efforts. I think, therefore, Ainan was just observing that if you think negatively then you avoid one potential consequence, each and every time: disappointment. I don’t think, given the way he actually behaves, that he was relating how he actually thought.

With Ainan, now, there is a tendency to coin punchy phrases and one liners. Yet, these may not actually describe his personal view on the world, but more of his perception of certain understandings that appeal to him, in an aesthetic way. By this I mean that he likes the sound of the thought he has expressed, but doesn’t necessarily hold it for himself. He is playing with thoughts and ideas and seeing which appeal to the mind.

I shall enquire more as to this attitude to negative thinking, in time. For now, I will say only this: if he holds some degree of negativity, it could be allied to his tendency to be self-deprecating. It is another part of his tendency to downplay things. In this case, downplaying the possibility of a positive outcome.  In all, it adds up to a more sober less exuberant view of the future and the world. Perhaps, actually, this leads to a certain “level-headedness”, in that he won’t get carried away with possibilities, but will seek to estimate actualities instead...or perhaps even underestimate them. It remains to be seen what effect this will have on his choices in life. At this time, it does not seem to hamper him from experimentation and growth in any way. I remain watchful.

Posted by Valentine Cawley

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Prince Charles on Human Achievement.

In 2004, Prince Charles commented on the aspirations of young people today. His comments were widely reported and were critically attacked. Many people thought he was trying to say that people shouldn't try to rise above their station, in life. They thought he was being, in some way, feudal. However, I don't think he really intended that. Let us look at what he is quoted to have said:

"What is wrong with everyone nowadays? Why do they all seem to think they are qualified to do things far beyond their technical capabilities? This is to do with the learning culture in schools as a consequence of child-centred system which admits no failure. People think they can all be pop stars, High Court judges, brilliant TV personalities or infinitely more competent heads of state without ever putting in the necessary work or having natural ability. This is the result of social utopianism which believes humanity can be genetically and socially engineered to contradict the lessons of history."

He is observing what is evident in young people in the Western world (and perhaps elsewhere, too): they seem to think they are going to be great. By this, I mean, that a typical teenager believes he or she is going to be one of the things that Prince Charles refers to: a pop star, a TV personality, a High Court Judge, a Head of State. One could extend the categories: a film star, a footballer, a millionaire (a billionaire), a model...etc, etc...Young people of today think their success is assured. They think that they stand above others now and ever will in the future. From the perspective of an experienced adult, who has actually seen the world in action, such an abundance of exuberant ambition is sobering to witness. It is sobering precisely because it is unrealistic.

What Prince Charles was grappling with is the simple fact that all of these aspirations that the children hold, require something most of the children will not have: natural ability, for one, and often a degree of willingness to work hard towards one's goals. For instance, any child can kick a ball. Many a child can dream of being the next David Beckham - but how many of those children actually have a significant athletic ability? How many of them have signicantly greater an athletic ability than their fellow children? How many of them, furthermore, are willing to hone their skills and their bodies through long years of training? Very, very few, indeed, I expect. They see the glamourous end: the famous footballer jetting about the world, from game to game, enchanted fans in hot pursuit. What they don't see is what that footballer had to go through to get there. They are able to envisage the beautiful life they would have, as a famous footballer, but not the life that is actually led to reach those goals.

Prince Charles was much criticized for his views - but I don't think that people were right to do so. I think that the media, in general, failed to understand what he was trying to say. He was saying that the youth of today had aspirations beyond their ability to achieve them. They aspired to be famous film stars, when they couldn't act and were not beautiful. They aspired to be pop stars, when they could neither dance nor sing, and did not delight the eye. They aspired to be High Court judges, when their academic prowess was only mediocre at best. His view is that the children had unrealistic expectations. His view was that the school system, which never chastised the children for mediocrity, never used the word "failure" in their general direction, did not acquaint the children with the idea that failure was possible. While this is good for self-esteem, it may lead to children who have unjustifiably high self-esteem. These are children who really, really, really, believe in themselves - but who really, really, really, lack justification for that self-belief. It was Prince Charle's implicit view that this situation was not rare, but common. Most youngsters of today fell into that trap. Most of them thought of themselves as great people, for whom great success was assured. Sadly, of course, almost all of them are going to fail. Statistics alone guarantee it. If you have a nation of 60 million people of whom 20 million aspire to be film stars and that nation only has enough room for 20 such film stars in that generation...how many are going to fail in their aspiration? 999,999 out of every 1,000,000. Only one in a million will see their dream come true. It is the same for all their other aspirations. So many people will be aspiring to their positions of success than there are places in those respective realms. The result is, of course, that almost all of them are destined for failure in their primary goals. Almost all of them will have to revise their goals, along the way, and settle for something else.

This is the reality of which they are unaware that, I think, Prince Charles was trying to awaken them to. The modern media world has conditioned people to believe that great success is available to all. The modern media creates stars out of nobodies, through reality shows. The modern media creates the belief in people that celebrity and wealth and a life of ease, are available to all, when in fact that they have always been and always shall be available only to the few. This is the "lesson of history" to which I think he refers. Great success has always been a rarity and always will be.

Prince Charles is not saying that people should not rise above their station - as some media criticized him. He is saying that they should have a realistic understanding of who they are, so that they might aspire to something they can actually achieve. A life spent chasing pop stardom when one doesn't have the requisite and multiple, native abilities, is going to be a life wasted. What if that person has, instead, other skills that might be better employed as a nurse or a doctor? Then that person really should look at the medical field. It is a question of finding a good match, in terms of career, for who you are. Too many people waste their lives aspiring to dreams that have no realistic possibily of coming true, simply because the people in question lack the requisite abilities.

Thus there is wisdom, not foolishness, in Prince Charles' advice.

Aim for what is a reasonable choice, for you. Do not aim for iconic cultural roles such as footballer or film star - unless you really have what it takes to succeed in such fields.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged eight years and one month, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and six months, and Tiarnan, twenty-three months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, Singapore, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)