A memory of childhood.

A few weeks ago, my wife, Syahidah, was reminiscing.

“One day, when I was nine years old, I came to understand something: as an adult, you have a choice. I wanted to remember this, when I grew up, so I said to myself: remember this – as an adult you have a choice.”

Her gaze was curiously inward and a little fond, as if touched by the little girl she had been.

“Well, you did remember.”

“Yes.”, she said quietly, pleased.

I was touched by this account. It was a sweet notion, that the little girl she had been, should try to communicate with the adult she was to become, by deliberately seeking to remember an insight she had had, into adulthood. It struck me as quite a mature thing to do for the little girl she had been. It meant that she understood the unfolding of life and what she would one day become. It also meant that she felt a need to speak to her older self, when she was no longer around to be able to do so. It meant she sought a sense of continuity between the present, that would one day be past, and the future that had not yet become.

Syahidah grew a little rueful beside me, as she dwelt on her younger self’s thought.

“Of course, when you become an adult, you realize that it is sometimes a little more complicated than that.”, she observed, cryptically.

“Yes. Sometimes. There are obligations.”

We agreed, in silence – but also, I think, in appreciation of the child she had been and the wisdom she had shown to understand that quintessential difference between a child’s life and an adult’s life – but also to have wished to communicate it, to her older self.

I had never met the child she had been – but I felt then, that she had been an impressive one, in a way, for she was, even when so young, seeking to understand what life was and how it is lived, at different ages. My wife would have been an interesting child to speak to, I think. Then, again, no doubt that is why she became an interesting adult to speak to!

It is funny to consider it but I feel this tale of my wife’s brought her younger self into the room with us, as if she did, in fact, manage to speak to the future: I felt her presence, on my wife’s tongue, in my wife’s eyes and in the expression on her face. My wife’s nine year old self had succeeded in bridging time, to speak with us, across all those years. She had, in fact, spoken to the husband she could never have guessed she would one day meet. How strange -and how touching. There was a depth to that moment, that reached back across the decades to a little girl, who no longer was, and a thought that had endured.

Thank you, Syahidah, for sharing that moment. It brought your childhood alive, for me. I glimpsed who you had been and sensed the wisdom you had, even then. Thanks.

Posted by Valentine Cawley.

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The good, the bad and the ugly.

Today, I watched a Western film with my sons. It happened to be The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. Now, before you start imagining that Malaysia is broadcasting old Westerns, I would like to point out that I got it on DVD, in a local store. It was in the "classics" section.

I grew up with Westerns. I used to watch them with my father. He was particularly fond of the genre and I remember well his excitement as he watched the films. He would identify strongly with the hero and become very engrossed in his every action. Indeed, at key moments he would lean forward towards the TV screen, clenching his fists, in the tension of the moment. I see, now, that this is evidence of his capacity for imaginative involvement - but at the time I just used to think how much he liked these films.

So, I suppose, in many ways, I associate Western movies with my father. It was almost always with him, that I watched them. Thus, it was a telling moment when I bought a Western movie to watch with my own sons. I suppose I was just being my Dad, to them. Now, I should point out that they had never seen a Western film, before. The genre is not popular in this part of the world and one has never been on TV here. Then again, the genre is no longer popular. New Westerns are not being made. Thus, for them, it was a new experience.

They watched intently. Mainly, though, they waited to see what would happen. I think the pace was unfamiliar to them. Modern movies are faster and linger less on expressions and character. The boys did not know what to make of a movie that wasn't always leaping onto the next scene as fast as possible. I didn't realize, until I watched this with them, how much the pace of modern movies differs from the ones I grew up with. Now, movies are a race, then, they were a stroll.

Ainan criticized the lingering shot at the end as the Good receded into the distance: "I don't even know why they include that.", he puzzled. "It is for atmosphere.", I informed him, knowing that it didn't fit his ideas of what a film should be.

"Did you enjoy it?", I asked Ainan at the end.

"Yes.", he confessed.

I was glad, for a moment.

"But not as much as other films".

I understood, then, that the childhood I knew was gone and I could not even bring a piece of it, into theirs. Their world was different. Their expectations were different. Even what a film shouuld be, was different. I had grown up in more leisured times - in the sense that a film, then, was allowed to take its time to tell a story. Now, stories have to explode across the screen - and that is what kids expect.

I remember well and fondly those childhood days watching Westerns with my father. However, my sons will not have such memories of watching them with me. Times have changed. The world has moved on and what once was, cannot be again.

Yet, it was good to see how they would respond to it. It taught me, at least, how different their expectations are, nowadays. I somehow doubt that they will ever go to the trouble of showing their sons a Western, someday.

I wonder what they will remember of how I brought them up? What will they one day show their sons? (Or daughters?) Will they ever do anything, in memory of me?

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, 10, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, 6 and Tiarnan, 4, this month, please go to:
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I also write of gifted education, child prodigy, child genius, adult genius, savant, megasavant, HELP University College, the Irish, the Malays, Singapore, Malaysia, IQ, intelligence and creativity.

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The way children understand.

Children are wonderfully open to experience. They allow themselves to do and see things few adults would do. 

The other day, Tiarnan started to explain a children's programme he had been watching on a DVD to his mother. With great animation and excitement he detailed for her, the plot of this film. He even accompanied his explanation with special effects sounds and gestures to illustrate the pictures he was painting. She listened intently.

What was funny about all of this, however, is that the DVD was in a language Tiarnan does not know: Thai. He had watched a Thai film and understood the plot of the film, enough to explain it to his mother, without having any access to the language at all. Few adults would, I feel, sit through an unsubtitled foreign language film, in an unfamiliar tongue. Fewer still would actually understand much of it or find it watchable, in any way. Tiarnan, however, was more than happy to watch it and more than able to focus on its strangeness and extract meaning from the, to him, "wordless" images. 

I am struck by this, how open Tiarnan is. When I compare him to adults I see closure in them, and openness in him. I would like to see him retain this openness, as he grows up, though I know it is customary for people to close down as they get older. In some ways, every adult should be like a child. I feel we would all be deeper, more learned, flexible people if that were so. Sadly, most adults are like adults - with all the limitations that implies. I wonder how this special quality of openness is lost along the way? Is it really necessary that we should all close down? 

Not only did Tiarnan watch the Thai film - but he later requested it repeatedly. He enjoyed it to the point of deliberately seeking it out. That indication of openness impressed me. 

Sadly, I don't think I could sit through a Thai film several times, without understanding it. Oh dear...I must have "grown up". 

Thank you, Tiarnan, for showing me a better way to be. 

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged eight years and seven months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, five years exactly, and Tiarnan, twenty-eight months, please go to:http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, Singapore, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, wunderkind, wonderkind, genio, гений ребенок prodigy, genie, μεγαλοφυία θαύμα παιδιών, bambino, kind.

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This blog is copyright Valentine Cawley. Unauthorized duplication prohibited. Use Only with Permission. Thank you.)

Reaction time and age of subject.

Children learn quickly, don't they? Adults are slow, plodding creatures in the classroom and it is the quickwitted child who beats them every time. So, a child is quicker than an adult in every way...right? Wrong.

Though a child is smaller and therefore there is less distance for nerve signals to travel around their bodies, the reaction time of a child is SLOWER than an adult's. In fact, there is an inverse linear relationship between age and reaction time. In other words, the older you are, the faster you are (to a limit). Indeed, one source I noted declared that reaction time in the first grade may be TWICE as long as reaction time in the sixth grade. So these age differences are marked indeed.

I think it is important for parents to know this. Don't expect a child to react with the swiftness of an adult. Not only will they not - but they can't.

In experiments on subjects of various ages, using two different stimuli - one a light which goes on and off (visual stimulus), the other a buzzer which sounds (audible stimulus), the mean reaction times were determined.

There are not only differences for age, but differences for sex, too.

I shall list the results for male subjects first.

Age: 20. Stimulus seen: 240 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 230 milliseconds.
Age: 30. Stimulus seen: 220 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 190 milliseconds.
Age: 40. Stimulus seen: 260 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 240 milliseconds.
Age: 50. Stimulus seen: 270 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 250 milliseconds.
Age: 60. Stimulus seen: 380 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 370 milliseconds.

Reaction time results for female subjects:

Age: 20. Stimulus seen: 320 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 310 milliseconds.
Age: 30. Stimulus seen: 260 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 200 milliseconds.
Age: 40. Stimulus seen: 340 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 300 milliseconds.
Age: 50. Stimulus seen: 360 milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 300 milliseconds.
Age: 60. Stimulus seen: 44o milliseconds. Stimulus heard: 420 milliseconds.

The big surprise in these figures is that 30 year olds are faster than 20 year olds, for both male and female subjects.

The other notable feature is that male subjects have faster reaction time than females at all ages.

I was somewhat shocked to note the very sudden slowing of reactions at the age of 60. They are markedly slower and less responsive than only ten years younger. It seems that we really do "slow down" as we get older. I just hadn't realized how marked the decline was.

An awareness of these charts can help us understand the needs of both the young and old. It also instils a new respect for 30 year olds. They are actually faster than teenagers! (I don't think too many teenagers will believe it though.)

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged eight years and one month, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and six months, and Tiarnan, twenty-three months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, Singapore, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)

Changi Airport, Singapore: Hafiz's flight.

The other day, my wife went to the airport, with Tiarnan, nineteen months, to see Hafiz Osman, her brother, off to the Istanbul Contemporary Art Biennial, to which he has been invited, as an artist.

Tiarnan was most enthused by the airport, not having seen one before and was quite taken by the expanses available to simply just run and play.

His attention was, however, drawn by a mysterious doorway off to one side of the concourse. It was a strange place that had a power over people that he could not understand. From all over the airport, men would hurry to this doorway and disappear within. They would reappear some time later and walk out more slowly, in a rather more relaxed fashion. For him, this was most interesting: why were those men hurrying there? What happened beyond that magic rectangle in the wall? Why were the men different on leaving, compared to their attitude on entering? One can imagine all these questions going through his head.

He pointed towards the doorway and said to his mother, Syahidah: "Just go! I want to see!"

He was duly taken within and looked around. Reality did not meet expectation, yet he peered around curiously.

Upon leaving, his mother said: "It's just a toilet."

"Just a toilet..." he echoed, satisfied, at having seen it, but a little disappointed that the secret power he had noted was not as great as he had supposed.

Hearing this tale made me feel how even the littlest thing may seem magical to a very young child. They know so little of the world, that so much of it appears wonderfully mysterious - even a toilet in Changi Airport can seem strange and interesting when you are nineteen months old.

It is rather sad to think that, by the time they are adults most of these wondering children will have lost all sense of wonder and so nothing will seem magical anymore. I hope it doesn't happen to any of my children. Let them wonder, at life - lifelong.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged seven years and nine months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and two months, and Tiarnan, nineteen months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)

The Fall Of Snail Kingdom

Throughout history, the fall of an empire has often been sudden and surprising: some unexpected turn of events occurs and all comes tumbling down. So, too, was it with the little principality known as the Grand Snail Hotel.

Those who have read the posts regarding Children and Pet Animals - and its sequel on The Grand Snail Hotel, will be primed to understand this post. If you haven't I suggest that you do, otherwise it will be meaningless.

You may recall that my wife and I found our sons building The Grand Snail Hotel in the lobby. It was constructed of plastics and provided a haven for gastropod life on our stairwell. It was also quite beautiful to look at. My wife promised to photograph it once we came back from the shops that evening.

Well, we did come back - but boy were we surprised at what we saw.

As the door to the lift opened, I saw my neighbour, with his back turned to me. In his right hand he held a large hammer. That didn't look good. Worse still, as I approached him, to investigate this strangeness, I saw that someone had kicked the hell out of the Grand Snail Hotel: it was lying in ruins in the stairwell, as if it had been attacked in anger. As I drew level with him, I saw something else: a blue powder on the floor to my neighbour's left: insecticide, I surmised, from the context.

After my sons had happily finished work on their hotel, and went back inside to loll contentedly by the television, mulling over their good deed, my neighbour had ventured from his home with a hammer and insecticide and set about killing my sons guests.

He looked at me and spoke in explanation: "Your sons have brought snails up here...they will eat my orchids."

It was quite surreal hearing a grown man speak of snails eating his orchids while he clutched a large hammer in one hand - and had once held insecticide in the other. It was like stumbling upon a serial killer quietly explaining why he was wiping out the neighbourhood: "They were eating my hamburgers." - or the like.

I nodded, to assuage him, thinking, that, noting the anger in his voice and the hammer in his hand that this was the most diplomatic choice at that moment. Besides, it was too late for most of the snails. They had either been squashed with a hammer - such a violent way to resolve the issue - or poisoned to death.

"It's a project." I pointed out, gently, putting the whole episode into the context of a child's exploratory life. I rather thought that, being Singapore, giving the situation an educative slant might mollify him. However, it didn't seem to.

He mumbled on some more about saving his orchids and I just nodded at what seemed like grammatically correct moments. I couldn't help but notice that he was all but choking on his own anger.

"Ask them to take them away by the end of today." He requested, at last.

I just nodded and oddly said: "Thank you."

I then went inside and told the boys the dreaded news about their now defunct snail colony.

"What?" was their simultaneous reply, as they leapt up to see what harm had befallen their guests.

I heard our neighbour explain to them that the snails would eat his plants so they had to go. He suggested that they gather them up - the survivors that is - and put them in a bucket so that they couldn't escape. He also said he wanted them gone by the end of the day.

They duly gathered them up into a bucket, covered it and left the snails alone for a few hours. By the evening it had gone.

This whole episode brought home to me what is wrong with Singapore. Kids are just not encouraged to play. The randomness of a good childhood is not thought worthy. There was so much to be learnt by my children through simply playing with and nurturing those snails - but that was not appreciated. It was taken to be a "naughty" act - which in this case was punished with the death of the snails.

Were his orchids really being eaten by the snails? I saw no evidence of them having left the stairwell...so no, I don't think so. They were well fed where they were and so had no need to seek food elsewhere.

I remember something funny now about our conversation. I pointed out to him, on hearing that they would supposedly eat his orchids that the children had left out food for them. "Yes," he said, delivering his words as if they were to be news for me: "Lettuce from your fridge."

I could hear in his voice that he expected me to be angry at this. He thought that I would see this as "naughty" and punishable, that I would somehow side with his world view and come down on my children for having the temerity to improvise a use for the food in my fridge. I knew then, that he really didn't understand my attitude to childhood - nor, what in my view, is a healthy attitude to parenting. For me, it is great if the children do something of their own volition. I like them to experiment. I personally couldn't understand why he would be so concerned about "misuse" of lettuce. It is more important that the children learn something, than that I have lettuce in the fridge. I can always eat something else - but they might never have another chance to learn this particular lesson.

I said nothing, however - for what could I say that would be understood by one whose views on parenting and childhood were so different from my own? I let it go, in silence.

I wonder what my children thought when they went outside and saw the ruins of their Grand Snail Hotel. What would they think of adults? They would have been confronted with the image of a man with a hammer, some blue powder on the floor - and a crushed hotel. How would they feel that their creative work - for all play is creative - should be so disregarded by an adult, that it should be destroyed in this way?

It was not what you would call encouraging for their efforts to receive this treatment. I am only thankful that I don't think Fintan noticed that snails had been killed. I am sure Ainan made the connection, however, but he said nothing to Fintan, which was sweet of him.

Together they gathered up the few snails that remained and made their goodbyes to them that afternoon.

Neither of them said anything about it - but I could feel that they were both disappointed. No doubt it has added something dark to their impression of the adult world. It would go something like this: "We build...adults destroy." or "We care...adults don't."

I am sure they understood the point about the snails eating the plants - but even so, the snails could have been moved by consent. All the neighbour had to do was knock on the door and ask them to take the snails away. He most certainly should not have set about killing them with a hammer. That is ugly - and unsettling.

Had I been in his position, I would have taken the "knock on the door" approach. It would never have entered my mind to start killing the neighbour's pets, simply because I didn't like them. In most places, that would be regarded as a crime. It probably is here, too.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged seven years and eight months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, four years and one month, and Tiarnan, eighteen months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)

Tale of a cowboy hat

A couple of days ago, my wife, Syahidah, placed a cowboy hat on Fintan's head and left him to his own devices.

Some time later, she saw him running around the house from one room to another.

"Fintan, why are you running around?"

"I am trying to catch my horse...it has run away." he explained.

He continued to run.

Some time later, he was standing still in his room, looking at something that wasn't there.

"What happened?" Syahidah asked him.

"Oh, I shot my horse.", he confided. "First I tied him up, then I shot him."

He was quite satisfied to have solved the problem of the horse that just wouldn't sit still.

It is the imagination of a child that I think is most precious - for in the mind of an imaginative child, anything can be considered and all is possible. Yet, is such imagination common to all children? From observation, I would say not. Some children don't seem to have much of an imagination. Is that the reason most adults lack imagination? Is it because they start out with none...or is it because they lose it as they grow up?

I rather hope Fintan doesn't lose his imagination, but finds a creative application for it, that satisfies him and brings him fulfilment. Right now, it is both fun and fascinating to watch his imagination at work. Long may it be part of him.

(If you would like to learn more of Fintan, three, or his gifted brothers, Ainan Celeste Cawley, seven years and six months, and Tiarnan, sixteen months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.hmtl I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, the creatively gifted, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)

Fintan spots a dinosaur

Fintan, three, has long wanted to see a dinosaur. I think this is an extension of his interest in animals. He has carefully surveyed his world but sees no overt signs of them. About six months ago, however, something very strange happened.

It was a Sunday. My wife had gone out with the other kids, leaving me with Fintan. To keep him interested I promised to take him to see where the dinosaurs were. This quite appealed to him and he soon readied himself for some dinosaur watching.

He sat in his pram, legs dangling over the side, for it would be far too far to walk at that age - or at least I had thought so.

We were to go to a wooded area near us: a kind of preserve, into which I intended to push the pram, if I could find the elusive entrance. All along the journey from our home to our destination, there were trees and vegetation at the roadside.

To keep up his interest, I asked him to look out for the dinosaurs in the woods - and he peered with great care into their midst. This stance went on for some minutes as we approached our goal.

Suddenly, in a moment of pure childhood magic, a giant green lizard came rushing out of the vegetation in front of us. It was quite the biggest lizard I had seen in Singapore. I couldn't identify its breed - but it really was at least a couple of feet long and quite bulky. I don't think it was a "Komodo Dragon" - for I have seen those in Malaysia - but it was impressive. It was green, tough looking - and dinosaurian.

Fintan's eyes were agog. Before him was a "dinosaur"...

"Look Fintan! It is a baby dinosaur!"

He was speechless. The "dinosaur" ran ahead of us for about ten metres then ducked back into the vegetation, having decided that it didn't want to be on the road.

Fintan craned to see where it had gone and only relaxed when it was clear that it was no longer to be seen.

The trip was a great success. In the most unlikely of ways, Fintan had come to see the "dinosaur" that Daddy had promised him. Never had I expected to fulfil the requirements of the day...but I had.

That evening, Fintan enthused about the "baby dinosaur" he had seen, to his mother, telling how big it had been - and how it had suddenly jumped out in front of him.

What a magical day.

(If you would like to read more about Fintan, three, or his gifted brothers, Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged seven years and four months, or Tiarnan, aged fourteen months, then please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, the creatively gifted, gifted children and gifted adults in general. Thanks.)

Do gifted children learn quietness?

Most people familiar with gifted children will have noticed that many of them are introverted. They prefer the riches of their inner worlds to the paucity of the outer world. Yet, how much of this is innate, and how much is learned behaviour?

As a young child, there was a marked discrepancy between me and the children around me. Looking back now, I see a gulf that was unbridgeable. At the time, I had no idea why the children were the way they were. Unsurprisingly, I thought of them as very simple creatures - though it appals me to write that childhood thought here, as an adult. Yet, I think it is important to introduce that thought - for perhaps many parents reading this, here, may have gifted children who are thinking that daily about the other children they meet. What effect does this disparity of mental development have on children?

One effect that could develop over time is the observed "introversion" seen in such children. If the other children don't understand when the gifted child speaks their mind, eventually such a child might very well learn not to speak their mind at all. A conditioned silence would develop which would be very hard to penetrate. Something of this kind happened to me as a child. I became an observer who didn't express the fullness of my thought: for I anticipated that such expression would be unwelcome. Perhaps the same phenomenon is unfolding in Ainan's life.

Did you feel this way as a gifted child? Do you think your gifted child feels this way? Is their reticence a learned behaviour? That is my theory anyway...your thoughts would be welcome.

(If you would like to read more of my gifted children, Ainan Celeste Cawley, seven years and three months, a scientific child prodigy, Fintan, three and Tiarnan, thirteen months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, the creatively gifted, gifted adults and gifted children in general. Thanks.)