Where all good deeds are punished.

Everyone has heard the phrase: "No good deed goes unpunished." - but have you ever seen such a force in operation? In Singapore, it is a daily occurrence.

Today, on the bus, I saw two instances of poor behaviour that would not even be recognized as poor behaviour by the perpetrators - yet poor behaviour it is.

The first occurred as a young woman got on the bus. She paid for her ticket - but then didn't collect it. She walked to the middle of the bus. The bus driver noted this and tried to attract her attention: "Lady! Hello!" he said, in English more polite than one was accustomed to, here, in Singapore. She ignored him, or didn't hear him. Seeing this, a man in his 30s walked down the bus to the "lady" and told her that the bus driver wanted to speak to her. She didn't reply to him. She met his helpful words with a sullen silence and not a word of thanks. She walked past him as if he did not exist and approached the driver. The bus driver handed her, her ticket saying: "You forgot this." She met his helpful words with a sullen silence and not a word of thanks. She walked back to the middle of the bus, as if the driver did not exist.

The second incident was more personal and happened later in the day. I was sitting on the outside of a dual seat. When I had sat down, the bus had been fairly empty, but quite a few people had just boarded. Seeing a young woman standing next to my seat, I rose from my chair and offered her the inside seat: "Would you like to sit down?" I asked.

She met my helpful words with a sullen silence and not a word of thanks. She sat down on the offered seat and looked away out of the window, as if, either I did not exist, or she did not wish to acknowledge that I did.

Now, in my country, both of these young women would be considered rude, ignorant, unpleasant and generally unworthy. When I lived in England, it was common to hear "please" and "thank you" rather a lot. Every courtesy was met with another courtesy in kind. To do a good turn for another was to receive immediate and genuine thanks. Not in Singapore, however. Here one can go all day opening doors for people, offering people seats, helping others in random distress - and NOT ONE OF THEM WILL THANK YOU IN RETURN. Politicians here talk about cultivating a graceful society - but Singapore is actually the most graceless place I have ever lived in. Here, the words "please" and "thank you" are not even in the local dictionary - or, if they are, no-one has read it.

It bothers me that I am not thanked when I show kindness or consideration to others here. They behave, in return, as if my kindness or consideration were their automatic right and I was beneath consideration for having shown it. It is quite unpleasant. I feel that Singapore is truly a place where every good deed is punished. For it is a kind of punishment not to be thanked and to be met with a surly silence every time one shows kindness to one's fellow humans, here. No wonder so many people want to leave Singapore. When one's fellow citizens are so uncivilized it is no surprise at all that they are all clamouring for somewhere else to live. What they don't realize is that they are each individually and collectively to blame for the poor social graces on show here - for each of them, typically, is guilty of them.

So, I have two messages today, for Singapore: they are the word: "Please" to be used before any request of another person, and the phrase "thank you" whenever anyone else does you a kindness or a service. Please use them, they make life so much better in a way you will only come to understand when their use is universal - for what they do is make people feel APPRECIATED.

Do you know what effect being snubbed by people every time I am kind to them has on me? It makes me think twice about considering others in future. The next time I have an empty seat to share with another, I may just decide to keep it to myself. After all, why should I think of others when to do so is only to receive rudeness in reply? The same applies to other situations in which I might assist others. Why should I pause to hold a door open, when to do so will receive no thanks and the other person will look on me as if I am some kind of slave, for doing so? So, I won't hold doors open, anymore. What if I can do something to help another, which means taking a minute of my time? I wouldn't do it, if I knew I would receive a sullen silence in return.

I am learning how to behave in Singapore. If I really want to fit in, I should just behave as if no-one else matters and no-one else exists. If I did so, I would be just as everyone else appears to be.

However, I don't really want to change in that way. I don't want to become the sort of person I have always despised. I would rather that everyone in Singapore change, instead, and become polite and socially graceful.

So the next time someone does you a kindness, just say: "Thank you." It would really help make Singapore a better place in which to live.

(If you would like to learn more of Ainan Celeste Cawley, a scientific child prodigy, aged eight years and seven months, or his gifted brothers, Fintan, five years exactly, and Tiarnan, twenty-eight months, please go to: http://scientific-child-prodigy.blogspot.com/2006/10/scientific-child-prodigy-guide.html I also write of gifted education, IQ, intelligence, the Irish, the Malays, Singapore, College, University, Chemistry, Science, genetics, left-handedness, precocity, child prodigy, child genius, baby genius, adult genius, savant, wunderkind, wonderkind, genio, гений ребенок prodigy, genie, μεγαλοφυία θαύμα παιδιών, bambino, kind.

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